Summer? Love?

By Shawneka Freeman

How often were you told that you are too young to be in love? I know I am not the only young person who has heard this unwanted opinion before.

I do not believe that we are too young. I believe that sometimes we may be too ambitious to be in love. When we are ready to settle down, we are not looking for the ultimate love, we are looking for the best suited companion.

The older I get, the more I want out of a man in terms of him being just as successful as me. It is like I am no longer willing to give unconditional love, my love is conditional on the success that a guy is bringing to the table. At this point in my life, a guy has to be getting an education like me or be working his way up in the professional world. I can no longer tolerate a guy who is just working for money and has no guaranteed place in the work world. Those types of guys end up in dead-end jobs with no financial stability.

After being with someone for almost three years, maybe I am just going through a phase, but the more and more time I spend focusing on my future I start to realize that I am not willing to put more time into a romantic relationship. I understand that it will take tremendous sacrifice in order for me to get where I want to be in life and honestly, the first thing I am willing to give up is my romantic relationship. From previous experience, I have realized that no matter how hard one may work for the success of a romantic relationship, the other may not work as hard for the relationship to maintain the already established success built by time. As college students or just young people in the world, time management is key in our future success and once one realizes this fact, a romantic relationship may become a time struggle. In any growing relationship one cannot neglect the other person because neglect leads to failure; respond to your relationship as a class at NDMU, after too many absences you will automatically fail.

My summer love life has not been very successful, but I did not give up I just put it on hold. I am starting to believe that summer flings do exist, but they may not be as interesting or beautiful as people or the media make them seem. Others portray summer love as an unexpected gift that one grows to not be able to live without, while the media, mostly movies, make summer love seem like the perfect all year round weather, like it just can’t get any better.

This summer, if you did not find love like me, just remember that you discovered more about yourself in the absence of love. Or maybe you didn’t, maybe you just wasted your summer away like I did last summer (by the way I was in a relationship then). Even though you may not have found “The One”, just remember not to ever settle because you should have a partner that compliments you. Even though you may have terms for your love, just know that your love can still be unconditional.

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